“The feeling that’s always there”: Prevalence and correlates of parental guilt in Italy
DOI:
https://doi.org/10.20377/jfr-1472Keywords:
parental guilt, parental shame, work-life balance parental guilt, anticipated parental guilt, measurement, ItalyAbstract
Objective: This article examines the prevalence and correlates of parental guilt and shame in Italy, including anticipated parental guilt among childless individuals.
Background: Parental guilt and shame arise when parents perceive a mismatch between internalized norms of good parenting and their actual parenting practices. While these emotions have been documented in other societies, empirical evidence in Italy remains limited, largely qualitative, and focused on mothers. This study addresses this gap by providing national-level evidence on both mothers and fathers and by extending the analysis to anticipated parental guilt.
Method: The study draws on an original online survey of 6,000 adults of childbearing age living in Italy, with a sampling design that deliberately oversampled mothers (3,500 mothers, 1,000 childless women, 1,000 fathers, and 500 childless men), with a final analytical sample of 5,587. The survey includes items measuring different forms of parental guilt and shame, as well as anticipated guilt. Exploratory Factor Analysis was used to construct five guilt scales, which were subsequently analyzed using OLS regression models.
Results: Parental guilt and shame are similarly prevalent among Italian mothers and fathers, with mothers displaying a modestly higher level of these emotions. No gender differences emerge in anticipated parental guilt. However, the correlates of guilt vary by gender, with economic well-being and gender-role attitudes emerging as the strongest and most consistent correlates across nearly all forms of guilt.
Conclusion: Parental guilt emerges as a salient emotional dimension in Italy not only among mothers and fathers but also among childless individuals, suggesting that moral expectations surrounding parenthood are widely shared in a low-fertility context.
References
Aarntzen, L., Derks, B., van Steenbergen, E., Ryan, M., & van der Lippe, T. (2019). Work-family guilt as a straightjacket. An interview and diary study on consequences of mothers' work-family guilt. Journal of Vocational Behavior, 115, 103336. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jvb.2019.103336
Aarntzen, L., Derks, B., van Steenbergen, E., & van der Lippe, T. (2023). When work–family guilt becomes a women’s issue: Internalized gender stereotypes predict high guilt in working mothers but low guilt in working fathers. British Journal of Social Psychology, 62(1), 12–29. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1111/bjso.12575
Aarntzen, L., van der Lippe, T., van Steenbergen, E., & Derks, B. (2021). How individual gender role beliefs, organizational gender norms, and national gender norms predict parents’ work-Family guilt in Europe. Community, Work and Family, 24(2), 120–142. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1080/13668803.2020.1816901
Ausubel, D. P. (1955). Relationships between shame and guilt in the socializing process. Psychological Review, 62(5), 378–390. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1037/h0042534
Aycan, Z., & Eskin, M. (2005). Relative contributions of childcare, spousal support, and organizational support in reducing work-family conflict for men and women: The case of Turkey. Sex Roles, 53(7–8), 453–471. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1007/s11199-005-7134-8
Bastaits, K., Pasteels, I., Ponnet, K., Mortelmans D. (2015). Adult non-response bias from a child perspective. Using child reports to estimate father’s non-response. Social Science Research, 49, 2015, 31-41. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1016/j.ssresearch.2014.07.004
Berzelak, N., Vehovar, V. (2018). Mode effects on socially desirable responding in web surveys compared to face-to-face and telephone surveys. Metodološki zvezki, 15(2), 21–43. DOI: https://doi.org/10.51936/lrkv4884
Borelli, J. L., Nelson, S. K., River, L. M., Birken, S. A., & Moss-Racusin, C. (2016). Gender Differences in Work-Family Guilt in Parents of Young Children. Sex Roles, 76(5–6), 356–368. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1007/s11199-016-0579-0
Borelli, J. L., Nelson-Coffey, S. K., River, L. M., Birken, S. A., & Moss-Racusin, C. (2017). Bringing Work Home: Gender and Parenting Correlates of Work-Family Guilt among Parents of Toddlers. Journal of Child and Family Studies, 26(6), 1734–1745. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1007/s10826-017-0693-9
Brilli, Y., Del Boca, D. & Pronzato, C. D. (2016). Does child care availability play a role in maternal employment and children’s development? Evidence from Italy. Review of Economics of the Household, 14(1), 27–51. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1007/s11150-013-9227-4
Calarco, J. M. C., Meanwell, E., Anderson, E. M., & Knopf, A. S. (2021). By Default: How Mothers in Different-Sex Dual-Earner Couples Account for Inequalities in Pandemic Parenting. Socius, 7. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1177/23780231211038783
Cornesse, C., et al. (2020). A Review of Conceptual Approaches and Empirical Evidence on Probability and Nonprobability Sample Survey Research. Journal of Survey Statistics and Methodology, 8(1): 4–36. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1093/jssam/smz041
Costigan, C. L., & Cox, M. J. (2001). Fathers' participation in family research: is there a self-selection bias?. Journal of family psychology, 15(4), 706. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1037/0893-3200.15.4.706
Derella, O. J., & Milan, S. (2021). I Felt Like a Terrible Mom: Parenting-Related Cognitive Processes Maintaining Maternal Depression. Journal of Child and Family Studies, 30(10), 2427–2439. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1007/s10826-021-02053-8
Dotti-Sani, G. M, Kulic, N, Jeannet, A. M, Soboleva, N., & Stoicescu, M. (2026), Work data for: "MatGuilt Survey Dataset" (Version 2) [Data set]. UNIMI Dataverse.
Dudley-Marling, C. (2001). School trouble: A mother’s burden. Gender and Education, 13(2), 183–197. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1080/09540250124726
Dunford, E., & Granger, C. (2017). Maternal Guilt and Shame: Relationship to Postnatal Depression and Attitudes towards Help-Seeking. Journal of Child and Family Studies, 26(6), 1692–1701. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1007/s10826-017-0690-z
EIGE. (2024). Gender Equality Index 2024. European Institute for Gender Equality. Retrieved from https://eige.europa.eu/gender-equality-index/2024. Last accessed 28-02-2025.
Esping-Andersen, G. (2009). The Incomplete Revolution: Adapting Welfare States to Women's New Roles. Cambridge: Polity Press.
Eurostat. (2025, March 7). Record drop in children being born in the EU in 2023. Eurostat. https://ec.europa.eu/eurostat/web/products-eurostat-news/w/ddn-20250307-1j [retrieved August 20, 2026]
Ferragina, E. & Magalini, E. (2023). Maternal employment and childcare use from an intersectional perspective: Stratification along class, contractual and gender lines in Denmark, France, Germany, Italy, Sweden and the UK. Social Politics: International Studies in Gender, State & Society, 30(3), 871–902. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1093/sp/jxad021
Fielding-Singh, P., & Cooper, M. (2023). The emotional management of motherhood: Foodwork, maternal guilt, and emotion work. Journal of Marriage and Family, 85(2), 436–457. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1111/jomf.12878
Foucreault, A., Ménard, J., Houlfort, N., Trépanier, S. G., & Lavigne, G. L. (2023). How Work-Family Guilt, Involvement with Children and Spouse’s Support Influence Parents’ Life Satisfaction in a Context of Work-Family Conflict. Journal of Child and Family Studies, 32(4), 1065–1077. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1007/s10826-022-02443-6
Gerson, K. (2010). The Unfinished Revolution: Coming of Age in a New Era of Gender, Work, and Family. Oxford: Oxford University Press. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1093/oso/9780195371673.001.0001
Gonçalves, G., Sousa, C., Santos, J., Silva, T., & Korabik, K. (2018). Portuguese Mothers and Fathers Share Similar Levels of Work-Family Guilt According to a Newly Validated Measure. Sex Roles, 78(3–4), 194–207. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1007/s11199-017-0782-7
Guendouzi, J. (2006). “The Guilt Thing”: Balancing Domestic and Professional Roles. Journal of Marriage and Family, 68(4), 901–909. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1741-3737.2006.00303.x
Haslam, D., Filus, A., & Finch, J. (2020). The Guilt about Parenting Scale (GAPS): Development and initial validation of a self-report measure of parenting guilt, and the relationship between parenting guilt and work and family variables. Journal of Child and Family Studies, 29(3), 880-894. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1007/s10826-019-01565-8
Holcomb, J. (2017). Resisting Guilt: Mothers’ Breastfeeding Intentions and Formula Use. Sociological Focus, 50(4), 361–374. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1080/00380237.2017.1313005
Jackson, D., & Mannix, J. (2004). Giving voice to the burden of blame: A feminist study of mothers’ experiences of mother blaming. International Journal of Nursing Practice, 4(10), 150–158. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1440-172X.2004.00474.x
Kim, A., Jeon, S., & Park, I. (2023). Influence of Parenting Guilt on the Mental Health among Single-Parent Women: Multiple Additive Moderating Effect of Economic Well-Being and Level of Education. Healthcare (Switzerland), 11(13). DOI: https://doi.org/10.3390/healthcare11131814
Korabik, K. (2015). The Intersection of Gender and Work–Family Guilt. In Gender and the Work-Family Experience: An Intersection of Two Domains (pp. 141–157). DOI: https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-319-08891-4_8
Law, N. K., Hall, P. L., & Cheshire, A. (2021a). Common Negative Thoughts in Early Motherhood and Their Relationship to Guilt, Shame and Depression. Journal of Child and Family Studies, 30(8), 1831–1845. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1007/s10826-021-01968-6
Lee, J. Y., Lee, S. J., Ward, K. P., Pace, G. T., & Chang, O. D. (2024). Shared parental responsiveness among fathers and mothers with low income and early child outcomes. Family Relations, 73(2), 683–702. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1111/fare.12913
Liss, M., Schiffrin, H. H., & Rizzo, K. M. (2013). Maternal Guilt and Shame: The Role of Self-discrepancy and Fear of Negative Evaluation. Journal of Child and Family Studies, 22(8), 1112–1119. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1007/s10826-012-9673-2
Lomazzi, V. (2017). Gender role attitudes in Italy: 1988–2008. A path-dependency story of traditionalism. European Societies, 19(4), 370–395. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1080/14616696.2017.1318330
Marschall, D., Sanftner, J., & Tangney, J. (1994). The state shame and guilt scale (SSGS). George Mason University. Fairfax, VA.
Martínez, P., Carrasco, M. J., Aza, G., Blanco, A., & Espinar, I. (2011). Family Gender Role and Guilt in Spanish Dual-Earner Families. Sex Roles, 65(11–12), 813–826. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1007/s11199-011-0031-4
Masarik, A.S., & Conger, R.D. (2017). Stress and child development: a review of the Family Stress Model. Current Opinion in Psychology, 13, 85-90. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1016/j.copsyc.2016.05.008
Mazzuco, S., Mencarini, L., & Rettaroli, R. (2006). Similarities and differences between two cohorts of young adults in Italy: Results of a CATI survey on transition to adulthood. Demographic Research, 15, 105–137. DOI: https://doi.org/10.4054/DemRes.2006.15.5
McDonald, G., O’Brien, L., & Jackson, D. (2007). Guilt and shame: Experiences of parents of self-harming adolescents. Journal of Child Health Care, 11(4), 298–310. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1177/1367493507082759
Miller, C. L., & Strachan, S. M. (2020). Understanding the role of mother guilt and self-compassion in health behaviors in mothers with young children. Women and Health, 60(7), 763–775. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1080/03630242.2020.1713966
Murray, L., & Finn, M. (2012a). Good mothers, bad thoughts: New mothers’ thoughts of intentionally harming their newborns. Feminism and Psychology, 22(1), 41–59. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1177/0959353511414015
Naldini, M., & Saraceno, C. (2022). Changes in the Italian work-family system and the role of social policies in the last forty years. Stato e Mercato, 124(1).
Niedenthal, P. M., Tangney, J. P., & Gavanski, I. (1994). “If Only I Weren’t” Versus “If Only I Hadn’t”: Distinguishing Shame and Guilt in Counterfactual Thinking. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 67(4), 585–595. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1037/0022-3514.67.4.585
Offer, S., & Kaplan, D. (2021). The “New Father” Between Ideals and Practices. Source: Social Problems, 68(4), 986–1009. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1093/socpro/spab015
Orth, U., Berking, M., & Burkhardt, S. (2006). Self-conscious emotions and depression: Rumination explains why shame but not guilt is maladaptive. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 32(12), 1608–1619. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1177/0146167206292958
Owens, R. (2022). “It’s the way they look at you”: Why discrimination towards young parents is a policy and practice issue. Children and Society, 36(6), 1280–1295. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1111/chso.12575
Pescud, M., & Pettigrew, S. (2014). ‘I know it’s wrong, but...’: a qualitative investigation of low-income parents’ feelings of guilt about their child-feeding practices. Maternal and Child Nutrition, 10(3), 422–435. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1740-8709.2012.00425.x
Rosina, A., & Fraboni, R. (2004). Is marriage losing its centrality in Italy? Demographic Research, 11, 149–172. DOI: https://doi.org/10.4054/DemRes.2004.11.6
Rotkirch, A., & Janhunen, K. (2010). Maternal guilt. Evolutionary Psychology, 8(1), 90–106. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1177/147470491000800108
Rúdólfsdóttir, A. G., & Auðardóttir, A. M. (2024). “I feel like I am betraying my child”: The socio‐politics of maternal guilt and shame. Gender, Work & Organization, 1–16. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1111/gwao.13124
Scarnier, M., Schmader, T., & Lickel, B. (2009). Parental shame and guilt: Distinguishing emotional responses to a child’s wrongdoings. Personal Relationships, 16(2), 205–220. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1475-6811.2009.01219.x
Seagram, S., & Daniluk, J. C. (2002). “It Goes with the Territory”: The Meaning and Experience of Maternal Guilt for Mothers of Preadolescent Children. Women and Therapy, 25(1), 61–88. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1300/J015v25n01_04
Símonardóttir, S. (2024). “Unless I could be like the typical dad”: Exploring parenthood through the perspective of the voluntarily childfree. Acta Sociologica, 64(4). DOI: https://doi.org/10.1177/00016993241260608
Símonardóttir, S. & Arnalds, Á. (2024). Excluding the Involved Father: Having a Child During the COVID Pandemic in Iceland, NORA – Nordic Journal of Feminist and Gender Research, 32(4), 363–374. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1080/08038740.2024.2323511
Shaw, E., & Bums, A. (1993). Guilt and the working parent. Australian Journal of Marriage and Family, 14(1), 30–43. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1080/1034652X.1993.11004456
Slobodin, O., Cohen, R., Arden, A., & Katz, I. (2020). Mothers’ Need Frustration and Controlling Parenting: The Moderating Role of Maternal Guilt. Journal of Child and Family Studies, 29(7), 1914–1926. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1007/s10826-020-01720-6
Tangney, J. P., & Dearing, R. L. (2003). Shame and guilt. The Guilford Press.
Tangney, J. P., Stuewig, J., & Mashek, D. J. (2007). What’s Moral about the Self-Conscious Emotions? In In Tracy, Jessica L., Richard W. Robins, and June Price Tangney (Eds.), The self-conscious emotions: Theory and research, 21–37
Taylor, E. N., & Wallace, L. E. (2012). For shame: Feminism, breastfeeding advocacy, and maternal guilt. Hypatia, 27(1), 76–98. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1527-2001.2011.01238.x
Uysal Irak, D., Kalkışım, K., & Yıldırım, M. (2020). Emotional Support Makes the Difference: Work-Family Conflict and Employment Related Guilt Among Employed Mothers. Sex Roles, 82, 53–65. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1007/s11199-019-01035-x
Vignoli, D., & Salvini, S. (2014). Religion and union formation in Italy: Catholic precepts, social pressure, and tradition. Demographic Research, 31(1), 1079–1106. DOI: https://doi.org/10.4054/DemRes.2014.31.35
Vehovar, V., Toepoel, V., & Steinmetz, S. (2016). Non-probability sampling (Vol. 1, pp. 329-345). The Sage handbook of survey methods. DOI: https://doi.org/10.4135/9781473957893.n22
Wells, M. B., Svahn, J., Svedlind, K. & Andersson, E. (2022). A qualitative study of Swedish fathers’ experiences of becoming a father during the COVID-19 pandemic. European Journal of Midwifery, 6. 1–7. DOI: https://doi.org/10.18332/ejm/146082
Williams, K., Donaghue, N., & Kurz, T. (2013). “Giving Guilt the Flick”?: An Investigation of Mothers’ Talk About Guilt in Relation to Infant Feeding. Psychology of Women Quarterly, 37(1), 97–112. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1177/0361684312463000
Williams, K., Kurz, T., Summers, M., & Crabb, S. (2012). Discursive constructions of infant feeding: The dilemma of mothers’ “guilt.” Feminism and Psychology, 23(3), 339–358. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1177/0959353512444426
Zhan, M., & Pandey, S. (2004). Postsecondary education and economic well‐being of single mothers and single fathers. Journal of marriage and family, 66(3), 661-673. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1111/j.0022-2445.2004.00045.x
Downloads
Additional Files
Published
How to Cite
Issue
Section
Funding data
-
Ministero dell'Università e della Ricerca
Grant numbers PRIN202223GDOTT_01; G53D23004740006.
